Money Tree

everyone is talking

about money on trees

everyone wants it

but listen to me please

you can’t climb in money trees

or you’ll get paper cuts

money trees wont grow any food

no fruits, vegetables or nuts

it can’t give you shade

cause the leaves always fall

and Forget about a tree house

cause money trees are never tall

and did you know this about money

when it grows on your trees

Mom still makes you get out there

and rake up the leaves.

Noises

Today something happened,
That I'll never forget,
It was very awkward,
And embarrassing I admit,

I had an itch that I scratched,
Up underneath my arm,
When my armpit farted,
Causing quite an alarm,

What had I done?
And what was I to do...
So I did it again,
Armpit fart number two

Now I'm a natural,
I can toot on command,
All it took was some practice,
And a cup shaped hand

Hey! Smile More

People are smilin’ all over the earth.

Each smile is unique. And each has great worth.

But the world can be a scary and full of nasty things.

Sometimes people get lonely. And forget to say cheese.

Some places have less sunshine shining on down.

So people do the worst kind of thing. People frown.

But never you fear, my friends. And never you worry.

There’s a trick up your sleeve to save the world in a hurry.

It’s a superpower you have and your friends can have it too.

Just tell them to follow after you and do as you do.

Make your eyes big, teeth clenched and lips really wide

Lift the corners of your mouth to your ears on either side

Your superpower is called smiling. So smile as much as you can.

Your superpower is working. It’s shining from here to Japan.

It’s shining to the moon and back, it’s shining to the stars.

It’s also shining on your friends, those near and those far.

It’s shining on the dark places where the sun can’t always be.

It’s shining on the monsters turning them into funky trees.

It’s shining on the ghosts and goblins shining away all the creepy.

It’s shining on the feisty creatures and making them all sleepy.

Your smile glows in the dark. And it shines on crocodiles.

It shines on your own reflection and creates double the smiles.

It shines on your family, whoever they may be.

It makes them happier and turns you and I into we.

Your smile can help the angry who’re mad about something silly. 

It can make grown-ups laugh or make you warm when it's chilly.

So if you see some people who don't want to play.

Shine your smile in their direction and brighten up their day.

Smile big and smile wide. Smile high and smile low,

Smiling is a superpower so be sure to smile mo'.

Red, Mine and Blue

Roses are red, 
and violets are blue,
Or is it just me, 
and roses are blue too,

Maybe my red 
is really your blue,
And your blue is red, 
but only to you,

Your sky is blue, 
and mine is the same,
But only by word, 
description and name,

Really yours is red, 
according to me,
If only I could see, 
just as you see,

Or maybe your red, 
is what I call green,
Do you see what I'm saying, 
or see what I mean?

But if you saw what I'm saying, 
you'd know what I mean,
When I say something's "red" 
you'd see what I've seen,

So you may never know, 
if violets are blue and roses are red,
Cause you're the only one, 
seeing from inside your head,

The Dean- An ode to Eric Dean’s beard

If your beard could talk, want to know what he’d say?

“Give me The Dean, give me the beard by the Bay,”

And he’d be right to wish, and right-er to covet,

If your beard could talk he’d tell you ladies love it,

For The Dean’s not too long, it’s the right amount of bold,

It will make you look rad, but wont make you look old,

It’s black and it’s grey, the combination perfected,

If The Dean ran for president, The Dean would be elected,

The Dean deserves respect, but also makes you smile,

And it gets better with time, so you can wear it for while,

So here’s to The Dean, a beard, a statement, and a friend,

The Dean is Eric’s beard, I hope he wears to the end,